Diwatang Byaning

S for spam bwahahaha!

I am quite pissed, as I got an email sent to me last Sunday - ng makita ko Lunes na. (To make a long story short, umaga na ng hinugot kasi! Hahaha…) While I was reading the email, I was in shock, surprised and in awe [Oh not really!]. *While scratching my head, sa taas!*

Back to the email para on topic, omg trulili nag orgasm akong tunay while reading it! (Kaya nga hindi ako nag-update ng blog ko kasi may hung-over pa ako? Hehehe.) Paano ba naman lahat, sumbat? Graveh na itoh. (Pero don’t worry, hindi kita babastushin. If you know what I mean. *WINK*) [Ibig sabihin nito matakot ka? Bwahaha. Charing lang!] Gentle dawg naman ako kahit na most of the time I speak and may look rough hahahah.

(more…)

Popularity: 27% [?]

I want to drink this now as in now na!!!

There’s just too much stress going on with my life right now. People who doesn’t give a fcuk and a slack to me… And one of em’ was my instructor. She is really gettin’ on my nerves earlier, the other day and alllllllllll the time, longggggggggg time - paano ba naman, nak ng pota may date ata si potah kanina nagmamadali ng nagmamadali… I just hate it. Might as well dismiss the class diva? One of the girls in my class told me that we don’t really need the stuff that she was sayin’ earlier - tipo bang just for the heck of it - basta maibigay at nasabing ibinigay nya. Ganun lang… Footang ina *Malutong sa dulo!*

Secondly, my phone’s been acting such dramassssssseesss lately. Minsan mamatay ng sarili, minsan sisindi magisa ka-urat. Kapag nag off bago mo magamit txt or call after an hour pa, ultimo phone book, di maka-access. Punyeta, poverty! Haysigh *Buntong hiningang malalim na hinugot sa pwet mo!* So para wala nang stress… I will call my cell phone provider and cancel the service, para manahimik na din ang buhay ko… Naiirita na ako sa mga letcheng no number at mga letsugas na number na natawag sa akin na hindi ko naman kilala ang number. (I guess it’s okay to cancel, wala namang nagmamahal sa akin eh., Bukod kay Jake [Wala namang cell yon eh, and besides aso po si Jake lol.] At hindi para magbayad ako ng monthly service ng wala - as in wala lang.)

Later bitches!

Popularity: 26% [?]

That is if you can!!! Madami nang naghangad na kumain at lumunok sa akin ng buong-buo, ni isa sa kanila hindi nagtagumpay! Dahil they was already dead! [Oh, well for me, di sila nag-e-exist sa buhay ko.] Why do they want to eat me alive? (Balatan at isawsaw sa suka?) Kasi maganda ba ako?

NOOOooooOo. Hindi ako maganda - Nagnanak-nak lang po sa ganda. Hahahaha!!!

Minsan kasi sa buhay naten may mga makikilala tayong mga tao na hindi natin gusto [Syet mga barooka same here!!!] may it be from school or workplace, they will stab you in the back that is for sure without you knowing it, dahil nakatalikod ka nga *Kulit! Mga futahg traydor, wag nyo akong tirahin sa pwet ko, asa harap ang butas hahaha, for real.*

Ewan ko ba daming insecure sa mundo~~~Syet! Buti na lang hindi ko pinepersonal…

Wala akong pakialam!!!

Motto in life: Mind your own galis, scratch your own buni!

Popularity: 13% [?]

I was so pissed today (What a beautifool Monday…) I am going somewhere this Friday, an orientation and gladly I called the office just to re-confirm. Dang, they told me to go somewhere doon sa bundok ng tralala daw - It was fine by me, at first. Then I asked so how about on Monday and the following days? Was it going to be here in the Bukirin?

Receptionist: Pumpkin it’ll be here on tralala… We moved 2 weeks ago.

ME: *DMV/USPS/DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH SIGH* Nagngangawa na ako ng bonggga, at bakit? At bakit hindi? They moved? Without any acknowledgments? Ano ba ako dito? Hangin? Tae-taehan? I am pissed off really… Kelan nyo ako balak i-notify sa Biernes??? Siyet!

After an hour… I got my cool. Tapos na yon, wala na akong magagawa pa.

[Signs ba to na wag na akong mag career ng healthcare?]

[Bakit naka penguin outfit ang mga pingers? Hahaha… We was at a blacktie earlier.]

Then I called the Department of Health regarding my Finger Prints at about 11AM.

You’ve reach the Department of Health blaaaaaaaahhhh blaaaaaahhhh blahhhhhh… To speak to a customer service representative during business hours from 9AM-4PM Monday thru Friday — Press 4…

Ako si gaga I pressed 4… It just keeps on ringing. *Agang lunch break naman nito?* O Hmmm di kaya Hawaiian time ito? Kaya wala pang nasagot ng 9AM? Masayadong maaga ang alas 11AM ko na tawag?

I dialed again and again and again the toll free number even the regular number for hours, as in for hours no jowk! Ano ba tong Department of Health na to nasa Pilipinas??? At hanggang ngayon may hangover pa sa Undas? Lahat na ng option pinagpipindot ko na just to speak to someone LIVE! Pero lahat ata busy kapag Monday??? Looks at my calendar *Holiday ba ngayon?* Hindi naman no!

So finally after dialing their number for hours already. I got into some mailbox doon sa Criminal Background Investigation Department, I was relieved, not until I left a message and after speaking for about 20 seconds I was cut off - damn it!!! (Ang itatanong ko lang naman eh simpleng asan na ang finger prints ko? Is it on the way??? Hindi naman ako magtatanong ng tungkol sa math noh!)

How the F can you leave a message and speak clearly for effin’ 20 seconds and kung ano ano pang anik? 20 seconds??? (I tell you 20 seconds buntong hininga ko pa lang yan…) Ang lala nakakainis… I called again and press chorva chorva and got into that mailbox again - after matapos ng recordning nila magsalita akalain mong MAILBOX IS FULL DAW… Pucha! ANO BA!!! I just hate it… Sobrang nakakapuwerwisyo! Grrrrrrr — Iritang-irita ako to the maximum levels!

(more…)

Popularity: 23% [?]

Ibrowse

Popularity: 11% [?]

Hindi na ako nag-oorgasm sa mga dramuh mo! As in hindi na ako nilalabasan *Tsk, how sad!*

Instead… Nakaka-tubol ka na, reallykili-kili - TOTOO! *Natitibi ako lately…*

I mean, I am not being sensitive here noh… Pero I hate it when someone accuses me na TAENG-TAE PA AKO KAY MANAT, uhmmm MANAT… [Tangina diba nilibing ko na yan? Kabasay ng

patay kong kuko??? DIBA? Isa ka pa nga sa nakiramay? Hahaha…]

Calling America’s Top Monay…

Me: What do you think of my post?

ATM: What post? The recent one?

Me: Yes! You think it’s for Manat?

ATM: NO!

Me: Kasi may pakialamerang “reader” accusing me… NOT BEING OVER WITH MANAT…

ATM: Ah ganun ba? Babae ba reader mo?

Me: YES, babae. Inaanalize mga nararamdaman ko…

ATM: And you can quote me on this one “Ganyan talaga ang mga babae, ino-over-aanalize lahat!”

To my dear reader na pumuna sa akin kanina sa txt…. Hindi ikaw ako para maramdaman mo ang nararamdaman ko. It’s not about MANAT… Or whoever or whatever ever gotesco at kung ano ano pang EVER! BwakanabitchabygollyWOW naman… Your mind is so advance… Graveh! Psychic ka ba? Ngayon alam mo ano nararamdaman ko? Hmmm totoo? Na fi-feel mo? Hmmmm…

Again, it’s not cute - SOOOOOoooo please PUTANG NA BUOT…
(more…)

Popularity: 15% [?]

I am not that old yet noh! I have been so restless by doing alot of thinking these past few days or should I say weeks? Months?

Thinking???, Whether to go pack my bags and just leave my life in some tropical 3rd world kwantri. (Footah kasi anlamig-lamig pala dito sa Amerika! Now ko lang na realize. Arg!) *I want to leave like a queen, aba sayang naman ang trust fund ko from my unemployment checks bwhehehe…* Malakas pa naman ang laban ng piso laban sa dolyar!

Plus-plus-plus I have been so very annoyed even at the littlest of things! *Annabel Rama Jr.?* That’s why I did not really consider it as a midlife crisis eh. Early menopausal lang po lol dahil sobra talaga akong irritacious nitong mga nakalipas na panahon lalo na kaninag umaga… (Feel ko ata maging Annabel Rama Jr. with matching Alfie Lorenzo sabay pokpok sa ulo ng mic!)

Uhg… Enough of the Annabel Rama thingy… Good news is, I am not having that mixed emotions anymore, since last night.

(more…)

Popularity: 11% [?]