Diwatang Byaning

Yesterday was my second meeting with my the rapist. Not much emotions thou, compared from out first meeting. - Dyus ko day!

Kwento-kwentuhan lang, sarap ng tarbahu nya no? Biruin mo makikinig ka lang tapos pang garnatcha na! Parang gusto ko na tuloy mag shift ng course intercourse ngayon pa lang, tutal kayang-kaya kong magpangap na kunwari nakikinog ako lol.

Back to my issues… No, she (Carrie Bradshaw) hasn’t diagnose me yet as bipolar and or a person that has add and yeah, no she hasn’t subscribe a medicine. Not yet. lol (Hindi po sya magazine… Walang pakialamanan. Gusto ang word na subscribe eh!) - Only my friends who are close to me knows that I am on a therapy. My fiancee and family knows nothing about this sh*t! Kayo, makinig kayo sa aking sasabihin, wag kayong magissue-issue’s jan. Mahal sya! he he he - honestly! Ligo lang ang katapat nito una kong nasabi sa aking sarili, pero hmmm I have to do, what I have to do.

There are times, that I feel so ashamed of myself. Almost everything about me she knows already. I got nothing to hide anymore! Even the birthmark on my armpit and the mole on my *** she knew about that too! I think, I just have to be myself right? Pero minsan natatanong ko sarili ko, kung tama ba yong nasasabi ko…

Kasi ganito yon…

Carrie: So what do/did you like about her?

Me: Hmmm *tingin sa kisame* hmmm, she nice sometimes… She almost does everything for me… The cooking, laundry, cleaning, driving, licking and f******… And I can really feel that she is sincere when she tells me something. But there are times too that am doubtful.

Carrie: Okay *sighsss* thats the most important thing, that you are feeling her sincerity. Is she sweet? Does she make you laugh?

Me: Yeah she is sweet… She makes me laugh sometimes…

Carrie: Do you like her attitude?

Me: Honestly? NO!

Carrie: Why?

Me: Well, she thinks different than me, I mean I know were 2 different persons here, but sometimes I just don’t understand how she thinks, I mean her logic.

Carrie: Ahhh…. How’s the sex?

Me: Oh the sex? I have no complains about that!

Anyways you know what I’ll be really, really sad if we really broke it off last time. I know, I love her., but sometimes, I don’t like that things that she does… Like for example, she wants all my attention… But if am the one who ask same thing from her she’ll not give that to me… Is that fair? How could she want everything and not give me back something? I really don’t know what’s the problem here. If it’s me or the other person?

Carrie: Your first brake up… Why did you break it off?

Me: I just want to stand on what I really believe in.

Carrie: Then why are you back together?

Me: We talked about it… Like were just gonna move forward and not look at the past… And I just blah it away… I was talking like a parakeet… And then suddenly I just blab… Oh you know sometimes… It’ s better than nothing! Opppss why did I just say that? What’s wrong with me…

Carrie: Whoa… Okay can we stop now, right at this moment and I want you to think all of that…

Me: Kala ko naman tipong pagtantuin ko ang aking mga sinasabi at nasa isip. Yon pala tapos na ang session at kailangan ko na pa lang hukugan ng quarter - masahol pa sa parking meter to ah! lol…

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