Diwatang Byaning

As “over it.”

Ever since I was a child, I really wanted to be in the Broadway, as far as I remember… I used to copy Annie! I looked up on Annie, really and sings…*Just thinkin’ about Tomorrow. Clears away the cobwebs, And the sorrow ‘Til there’s none.*

According to kikipedia: Mind refers to the collective aspects of intellect and consciousness which are manifest in some combination of thought, perception, memory, emotion, will and imagination. Mind can be defined as the stream of consciousness. It includes all of the conscious processes of the human brain. The word is also sometimes used, in certain contexts, to include the working of the human sub-conscious or the conscious thoughts of animals. “Mind” is often used to refer especially to the thought processes of reason.

Theatre of the mind it is! Right now I am imagining myself as really over and done with it. (I hope so. I want to feel the excitement of knowing I did it, I have survived and life is good again.
) Our mind is a very power tool! Kaya kayo isaksak nyo sa mga kukute nyo, nothing lasts forever! I can’t wait for sun to come out again, gorgeous women will appear from nowhere before my eyes! Charok!

I did my very best part for reals. I don’t want to feel sick and sorry for myself anymore. There is no one going to help me, not even my room mate or my councilor. It’s me, myself, I and Ambient!

I may be really confused at times… It’s like am taking drugs, am drunk or whatever, but it’s just me. Absent minded kasi ako lagi sobra. I often times don’t pay attention to things and or maybe just don’t care.

We had a fight that’s been going on for like 2days now. She used very hurtful words on that txt message. I don’t think I still have to have a closure. The txt message alone is enough. I was really hurt bothered with that message that she sent me last night. I could still not fathom those words coming out from her mouth, the one that I love. Thinking and knowing that she love or just used to love me… Whatever! - Masakit! Masakit sa dibdib, alisin o luwagan ko man ang bra ko… Masakit pa din sya.

Hindi ako panget o maganda. I say I have the looks, masama nga lang! Alam ko sa sarili ko, may makikita pa akong mas sa kanya. Pero bakit ako nagtya-tyaga ako dito? Masokista ba ako? Dalawang dahilan kung bakit ako nakakabit pa din sa relasyong ito… Kung ano man yon, I better keep to myself.

Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.

Popularity: 4% [?]

I know y’all gonna ask me what’s new! Alam ko!

I wanted to share my fortune or should I say misfortune? Eto ang chika…

A little craziness is just what you need — and it’ll give your relationship a boost, too. Be your wildest, most uninhibited self. The resulting shake-up will rattle any remaining doldrums in your life.

-Tama ba nababasa ko? Inuulol ba ako ng hulang ito? Craziness is what I needed? Eh kulang na lang magsaksakan kami at patayin ang isat’isa! Is that what you call a little craziness? I dunno what I really want as of now… Should I go or should I stay… Litong-lito na ako. Hindi ko na kilala ang sarili ko. Hindi ko malaman kung ano talaga ang gusto ko. Nahawa na po ako ng pagka-bipolar.

I feel angry, embarrassed and ashamed at times. Am I to be considered an in denial battered woman? I have experienced alot of abuse, really. But I managed to stay alive and fight it. Quitters are losers and I’m no quitter.

I may not have any black eyes and or broken bones. However, domestic abuse encompasses a whole range of ways of controlling and hurting. My stupid mistake is thinking the one who hurt me most, won’t hurt me again… Words sometimes can hurt more than a punch. Words penetrate your very being, have the ability to make or break your day. Words hurt the spirit and bruise the heart, some “internal’ bruises stay with you a life time. - NOooo she didn’t call me the N word thou. LOL. - Kaya nga I really need to talk and see my councilor no… Ano ba tong nararamdaman ko? Is it love or lust?

I have traveled a road going far too down and deep… I should have looked first before I took this road.

I have lost my self-esteem. For me this is very important. The most important possession a person has is their self-esteem. Self-esteem can move mountains and maybe, just maybe change your fortune too…

It’s not about complaining, blaming or even pointing fingers… I guess “Life is all about turning lemons into lemonade”.

Popularity: 5% [?]

So last night was the first time me and my room mate had a bonding. Well were 2 busy individuals no… Even if were in the house we don’t see each other often - hindi naman mansyon ang bahay namin… Busy lang kami… Sa pag-blo-blog parehas lol. So kagabi he invited me to smoke up in the 3rd floor… Aba nakalimutan kong may 3rd floor pala kami… Ang sarap diba? Yosi-yosi habang nood ng t.v?

We were watching Emergency. It is kind of depressing to see other Filipino’s living that way… (Nangangalkal sa basura may mapangkain lang. Nanghuhuli ng hito ang mga batang 7 and even 5 years old maisalba lang ang gutom kahit pa magkasugat-sugat ng katawan nila.) Personally I don’t like to see something like this… Sabi nga ng ka room mate ko masyadong depressing. Totoo! I feel guilty! Para bang ayaw ko na lang din kumain at damayan na lang sila

…There’s this family who is living in Tondo, the family is composed of 7 people including the mom and dad, the father works as a scavenger, he would go to this mountain full of trash to look for old nails - pako hindi kuko! and scrap woods and sold it to a local junk shop - PHP15.00 ang kinita nya maghapon? Paano nya masusuportahan ang mag-anak nya sa ganitong kita? It was past 4 PM when they had their lunch. On the interview the dad said sometimes they even eat salt with rice. Kahit asin lang masarap na.

And on dinner time they had a can of Ligo Sardines paghahati-hatian nilang mag-anak yon. Naalala ko tuloy ng huli kaming nakakain ng sardinas, noong isang linggo! Apat na sardinas ang kinain namin, apat kaming kumain. Isipin nyo yon, yong kinain namin 4 na sardinas ilang pamilya ang pwede pa lang mabusog at mabigyan ng sustansya doon? Samantalang kami 4, 4 lang kaming lumapang nun. Hindi ba nakaka konsensya yon?

Chuva: Bakit kung sino pa ang mahirap, sila pa yong madaming magka-anak?

Me: Palibhasa kasi wala silang t.v sa bahay, kaya ayon dyug na lang ng dyug pag walang magawa, para lang may magawa. Nakakita ka na ba ng pamilya na nagmamay ari ng telebisyon set at sampu-sampu ang anak? Diba wala! Kasi may pinagkakalibangan sila!

After watching this family composed of 7 people having a feast with a can of Ligo, depression naman ang sumunod na topic. Mayroon umakyat ng billboard at tangkang pakamay dahilan sa wala daw syang tarbahu at tila nangungulila sya sa kanyang mag-ina. Meron namang isang lalaki na na feature din sa sobrang kalungkutan eh, pinagtatataga nya ang sarili nya sa kamat at braso - eh kung gusto rin lang pala nyang mamatay eh bakit hindi leeg nya ang tagain nya *Kamot-kamot ulo* at kung paminsan naman eh nakain sya ng kuryente - ganun na lang ba talaga kahirap sa Pinas? Ultimo kuryente nilalapang? Eh baka naman mas mura pa ang pagkain kesa sa kuryente?

Ayon sa aking re-search ito pala ang sintomas ng dipresyon… Depressed mood,*Malamang diba? Kaya ng tinawag na deprresion diba?*, Loss of interest or pleasure, Sleep changes, Psychomotor agitation or retardation, Fatigue or loss of energy, Self-loathing, Concentration problems, Irritability, Aches and pains and Appetite or weight changes *Chuva, girl hindi tayo depress malayo tayo sa depression!*

Popularity: 5% [?]

Really kili-kili we do alot of activities, kahit kaming dalawa lang madalas. Name it. Ginawa na namin. Palibhasa parehong makati! Makati ang mga paa. Ibang tao jan kala siguro panay kilitian kami ng t**** lang lagi? Hindi totoong panay kilitian kami ng tenga! Mga bastus!

Lingo-ligo ibat’-ibang activities ito. Halos sinuyod na namin yata lahat ng museum dito eh. Ultimo paglalaro ng golf pinatulan na din namim. Naging magka sparing partner na din kami (Palibhasa parehong nag black belt holder.) Endless picnic (Palibhasa mga byaning!) Cooking (Yan ang dahilan kung wakit nag gain ako.) Biking, Rock climbing, Kayaking, BBQ-ing ay nako lahat na yata ng may I-N-G nagawa na namin! At kung iisa-isahin ko baka sa 3005 pa tayo matapos.

Parang gusto ko ata mag plano ng bagong activity, for a change! Tipong… hmmm cleaning the house, sweeping the floors, washing and folding clothes mga ganyan bang tipo…=) Na o-OC ako sa totoo lang!

Popularity: 4% [?]

So off to the beach with my lovely buddies and fiancee. We had fun. Wala kaming ginawa kung di “Iritahan kami ng iritahan!” We stayed under the sun for like 7 hrs o diba? Ni wa epek nga maputi pa din ako sa tagak palibhasa ang spf eh +100 ata.

Here’s my fiancee before the tsunami lol… Bago sya matangay ng alon. (Sana pinabayaan ko na lang matangay bwihihihii… Loko lang!)

What did we do? Eh di nagiritahan kami ng iritahan he he he… No of course not! We went there to do male watching… Hanap hanap ng by’s!

Sinong magaakala? Na mga bactidol sila? Eh maskulado pa sila sa maskulado.

Isa pa tong si papie, awww… Pasaway!

Di gaanong ka-yummihan! Pwe…

Anybody fancy chocolat?

Masyado namang seryus tong mamang to! In fairness, gwapo yan. Pero kahit na tonetoneladang lalake at notalya ang nasilayan ko, eh byaning pa din po ako. Wala nang pagbabago yon! Ahihihihihhihihihiiii…

Ekkkkkk… Wot happened? Sabi ko male watching, hindi whale watching!!!

May gaganda pa ba sa kanila?

While walking holding hands pa-sway-sway pa sa shore… Eh nakita ko si Shaneyney… Guy’s meet my new found friend… Si Sheneyney, feeling nasa nude beach ang bruha!

Popularity: 3% [?]

Rainbow…

It is an optical and meteorological phenomena that cause a spectrum of light to appear in the sky when the Sun shines onto droplets of moisture in the Earth’s atmosphere. They take the form of a multicoloured arc, with red on the outer part of the arch and violet on the inner section of the arch. More rarely, a double rainbow is seen, which includes a second, fainter arc with colours in the opposite order, that is, with violet on the outside and red on the inside.

Popularity: 4% [?]

Top earner daw ako for the day? I wish sana laging ganito para piyesta! Kelan kaya ako magiging boss ng sarili ko? Ayaw ko na mag tarbahu. Ayaw ko na ng may amo. Mag blog na lang tayong lahat!

$30.00 for one post - 200 words! Inviting? Start monetizing your blog now! Blog the things that you love and get paid at the same time.

Popularity: 5% [?]

Okay I sayyyy… Enough for the D-R-A-M-A! There are more serious stuff than that and that is The 2007 June Nursing Results - I love this nurses! REALLY!

MY CONGRATULATIONS TO THE FOLLOWING WHO PASSED!

15223 JAMORA, ZANDRA GRACE CARLET
15222 JAMORA, KRYSTINE COLETTE GO
26037 SALINEL, JOVIE TRIUMFANTE
4300 BENEDICTO, MARIA CECILIA CIOCON

June 2007 nursing board exams result out

More than two months after some 80,000 nursing graduates took the June 2007 licensure exams, the results are out, chairperson Leonor Rosero-Tripon of the Professional Regulation Commission told INQUIRER.net in a phone interview Sunday.

She said the passing rate for first-time takers, repeaters, and voluntary examinees is 48.18 percent or a total of 31,275 of the 64,909; for those who re-took the exam as per a decision of the Court of Appeals, 73.8 percent or a total of the 248 of the 336; and for those who re-took tests 3 and 5 as per a decision by the United States’ Commission on Graduates of Foreign Nursing Schools (CGFNS), 68.9 percent of some 13,000.

PLEASE CLICK THE FOLLOWING IN TEXT FILE:

1.2007-nursing-topnotchers.txt

2.2007-nursing-results.txt

OR CLICK THE TAB ABOVE “BOARD EXAM”

AND HERE ARE THE TOPNOTCHERS:

The successful examinees who garnered the ten (10) highest places are the following:
RANK NAME SCHOOL RATING (%)

1. DARLYN LUBANG CHUTUAPE OUR LADY OF FATIMA UNIVERSITYVALENZUELA 88.00
2. ROMEO CARANDANG PANGILINAN DE OCAMPO MEMORIAL COLLEGES 87.80
3. PIERRE CREED GARIN FLORENDO MOUNTAIN VIEW COLLEGE 87.20
MONA LISA UY PUA CHINESE GENERAL HOSPITAL COLLEGE OF NURSING & LIBERAL ART 87.20
4. JAYSON LIBAO CO UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 87.00
JEMIE SERRANO KOON UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 87.00
5. IVY JOY TUGAS CASIS DE LOS SANTOS COLLEGE (DELOS SANTOS SCHOOL OF NURSING) 86.80
JUNDELL ANDRADE CASTARDO UNIVERSITY OF CEBU 86.80
MICHELLE ANCHO CORPUS SAINT DOMINIC SAVIO COLLEGE 86.80
MEL ANTONETTE MENDOZA LUCERO BATAAN POLYTECHNIC STATE COLLEGEBALANGA 86.80
MARK RODELIO MACARAEG MARCOS UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.80
MA. PRISCILLE TUBIANOSA OGENA BICOL UNIVERSITY-TABACO 86.80
SHALYMAR SANTIAGO ZABALA UNIVERSITY OF LUZON (LUZON COLL.) 86.80
6. NICOLE JAN ARROJADO CABRERA UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.60
CECILIA ARCEO DACANAY BAGUIO CENTRAL UNIVERSITY 86.60
JULIE ANNE PAULE PINEDA OUR LADY OF FATIMA UNIVERSITYVALENZUELA 86.60
AYNNE TUMOLVA TAGUBA SOUTHEAST ASIAN COLLEGE (UDMC) 86.60
YASMIN MICHELLE DE RAMOS UMALI UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.60
7. IMELDA TERESITA PASIA CELESTINO PHILIPPINE COLLEGE OF HEALTH & SCIENCES 86.40
PATRIUSS DIONISIO CRUZ FAR EASTERN UNIVERSITY-MANILA 86.40
HILARIOUS EVANGELISTA DE JESUS UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.40
LEAH TUPINO QUIJANCE SAINT DOMINIC SAVIO COLLEGE 86.40
CLAUDINE MARIE LLAVE RENIEDO UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.40
DANIELLE RITZ ESCOPETE SHALA UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.40
HAIDEE ALEJANDRO WASAN UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.40
8. MA. AZUCENA LACSON ABELLA WEST NEGROS COLLEGE 86.20
RAYMUND JOHN YELO ANG UNIVERSITY OF SAINT LA SALLE 86.20
HANNI MAE SIBUCAO DADUYO UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.20
RANK NAME SCHOOL RATING (%)
BREN LESTER VILLAFUERTE ISIP UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.20
ONELIA RUBY CATALUÑA JOSE DR. YANGA’S FRANCISCO BALAGTAS COLLEGE 86.20
APRIL CANDY UY YAP KONG CEBU NORMAL UNIVERSITY (CEBU STATE COLLEGE) 86.20
JAIMIE RIZZA SANTOS MISLANG UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.20
HAPPY LYNN TO ONG CHINESE GENERAL HOSPITAL COLLEGE OF NURSING & LIBERAL ARTS 86.20
SANTONIN DUARTE YU UNIVERSITY OF CEBU IN LAPULAPU & MANDAUE 86.20
9. MAE AILEEN VALDEZ AGUSTIN UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.00
ARIAN JOY OLIVA ANDONG CENTRO ESCOLAR UNIVERSITY-MANILA 86.00
TRACY JOANNA ANARCON BIAZON MANILA DOCTORS COLLEGE 86.00
FLORENCIA CAMPOS CAMPOS ARRIESGADO COLLEGE FOUNDATION, INC. 86.00
MICHAEL LOUISE ALPUERTO CERVANTES CEBU CITY MEDICAL CENTER (CEBU CITY GENERAL HOSPITAL) 86.00
DIVINA ZUERTE PASETES DIOMAMPO PINES CITY COLLEGE (PCEC) 86.00
MARK DAVID DE GUZMAN FRANCISCO OUR LADY OF FATIMA UNIVERSITYVALENZUELA 86.00
MA. ASUNCION QUITO HIPOLITO PERPETUAL HELP COLLEGE OF MANILA 86.00
JENNIELYN ONG NUEZ VELEZ COLLEGE 86.00
ANNE CHRISTINE AGLIPAY REBADULLA DR. YANGA’S FRANCISCO BALAGTAS COLLEGE 86.00
FROILA BAGTING REYES MANUEL S. ENVERGA UNIV. FOUNDATIONLUCENA CITY 86.00
CARIELLE JOY VINGNO RIO CENTRAL PHILIPPINE UNIVERSITY 86.00
VANESSA LUCAS SANTOS FAR EASTERN UNIVERSITY-MANILA 86.00
BRIAN MARTIN CHUA TAN VELEZ COLLEGE 86.00
MARIA REGINA MERZA TIRU UNIVERSITY OF SANTO TOMAS 86.00
JEWEY ANN REGNER TORREFRANCA SOUTHWESTERN UNIVERSITY 86.00
MARIA CHRISTABELLE MENDOZA VINARAO MANILA CENTRAL UNIVERSITY-CALOOCAN CIT 86.00
MAUREEN MANALANG ZABALA OUR LADY OF FATIMA UNIVERSITYVALENZUELA 86.00
10. KINO XANDRO GONZALES ANUDDIN ATENEO DE ZAMBOANGA 85.80
FRANCO ASUNCION BAIÑGAN ARELLANO UNIVERSITY-MANILA 85.80
MARIE JOY GUNDRAN BORDEOS MANILA DOCTORS COLLEGE 85.80
GILBERT CALZADA ENDRIGA VELEZ COLLEGE 85.80
ROANNE MANZON MENDOZA FAR EASTERN UNIVERSITY-MANILA 85.80
CYRUS MAN GONZAGA PAALISBO SOUTHWESTERN UNIVERSITY 85.80
MARY ANNE REAL REYNES RIVERSIDE COLLEGE 85.80
CRYSTAL GAYLE GUINTO SARMIENTO DEE HWA LIONG COLLEGE FOUNDATION 85.80
CHERYL ROQUE VILLANUEVA MANILA DOCTORS COLLEGE 85.80
NOTHING FOLLOWS———————-

Courtesy of Reyna Elena

Popularity: 48% [?]

A woman of my word!

Ang nakaraan sa pakikipagsapalaran ko… [The past in my misadventures lol…]

I broke it off the other day, and the next morning I took it back. And played CIA and FBI and blah-blah-yadda-yadda found something. (I should have played CIA and FBI before I it took back.) *Tsk sayang… Sabay snap ng fingers!*

We are back in each others pus***. I decided to okay just work it out. Work out our fucked up relationship. If not for playing CIA and FBI sana masaya pa din kami, ako hanggang ngayon. Promise hindi na ako magiging atribida at pakialamera. I have created my own monster. Bahala ka kung lokohin at gaguhin mo ako bahala ka, wala na akong pakialam! Am tried! I don’t care anymore. I have really learned to love her for reals. Basta ako malinis ang konsensya ko. Wala akong ginagawa. (Yeah I have lied to her too. But in a different level. I know, I know it’s still a lie.) I have not talked to any of my ex and anybody that I have flirted before.

Whenever were together as in pakiramdam ko reyna ako sa mga paglilingkod nya sa akin! Believe me she would even clean my nose and ears after i take a bath. She cooks for me/us. Pinapaypayan pa ako nyan kung naiinitan ako. She does everything for me tapos ganito pala? I don’t even go to her place anymore. Not that often. She has to drive 45 minutes to see me, every week… Kagandahan ba ako?

Buhay nga naman. BENEFIT of the DOUBT kung ganun ang labanan lol. Forgive and Forget!

Sunday’s plan is to play golf. Instead I have something on my mind. Why don’t we play hmmm paint ball, war games and or do rock climbing and or white water rafting! So I phoned her and told her what’s on my mind… She liked the idea. So top priority is the white water rafting and the paint ball while it’s still warm and can do outdoor stuff.

Masama na kung masama…. Pero kung mag paint ball kami o kahit pa war games… We are not going to play for the same team pero shempre hindi nya alam yon… Naiisip nyo ba naiisip ko? Bwahahah… Para kahit papano makaganti ako ng hindi nya alam. At kung white water rafting naman… Eh lunurunin ko na lang sya. *Sayang sana insured sya ng $1 million lol.*

Sex last Friday was ahhh G-R-E-A-T! *Sings… Mr. Lover lover, Mr. Lover lover, girl, Mr. Lover lover. She call me Mr. Boombastic say me fantastic, touch me in me back. She say I’m Mr. Romantic la-la-la-la-la*

Popularity: 4% [?]

Yesterday I went to see my Therapist for the first time. But before I see her. I did a little therapy myself. I cleaned my room and the bathrom lol.

[At the office] So I blab right away… (Of course, it’s just a 45 mins session. And I don’t want to waste any second, minute of it.)

She just listened to my story and the drama of my life. Do you want to know what she told me? (Uh-uh I am not what you need girl! You need a Life Coach! You cu*tsucking b*tch.) Nah she didn’t course not. It felt good and right talking to her.

In fairness she is very young and very attractive person. *Sizzles… Awww*

Case accepted! I need to see her at least once or every other week. Yeah, I have alot of issues! I guess. - But just in-denial of it. I don’t know cause right now I am very confused and I have alot of emotions inside me just bottled up. It is very good that I have someone to talk to. It helped sorta… No rush am not in a hurry… I know it takes time to heal someone who had been broken alot of times.

I guess I maybe whole outside… But inside me, it’s like broken and shattered glasses. I have been in-n-out of abusive relationship in the past… I was once a victim of domestic violence. I use to heal myself. Yeah-huh, I was once healed. But once and again I am broken. That’s why I decided to get a help from a professional. I look forward of living my life the way it used to be…

I broke it off the other day, and the next morning I had a chance to talk to my dear friend Le and asked his opinion. In a way he is right. I shouldn’t invaded her thing. I should have waited. I should let her do her thing. I should not have not mind her own business. He even told me yeah what if she’s just confuse blah-blah-blah… And it’s over and done. He even told me that I shou;d have given her the benefit of the doubt. — Right away I called her. And ask for an apology (Even she lied to me, I still asked for her forgiveness. I am wrong. So, you know were back, in each others pu****.)

I will be seeing her tonight, so I got her a bouquet of pink roses yesterday. After 10 mins. There I go again… I found myself playing FBI and CIA again. I have discovered something. Confirm. They had been together. NO doubt about it. I don’t want to go thru the details. I don’t want to feel the pain again. - Cause for me right now am fine already. I have accepted it. Maybe it’s my fate. You know what? I couldn’t even cry anymore.

I will try my best to show her that I still love her very much in spite of what she did. In fact, the way I treated her was as if I was the one who made a mistake. - REVERSE! I don’t play CIA or FBI anymore. I promise that myself. Healing begins in me, instead I forgive and forget. Whew tangina! (Son of a bit**) He he he…

“I may be able to bear the pain when love begins to hurt. And when it hurts, I may still be able to give even more. I may be even able to love until it hurts no more.” - This is my Iwa Motto Yamamotto! (Barilin nyo ako ng BB gun nyo, Asan na ang guro? Lumabas ka jan!) Paging Teacher Gee!

Popularity: 4% [?]